What words?

I spend a half of my day thinking about the words for here. Maybe, you`re thinking "I found", but the reply is: "No... I can not", but I take a decision. Simple and Objective... I`ll just put my life here, but, this is the problem... whatever...
I was at school last night and I saw a great documentary about the brazilian culture for study, it`s sucks the schools here but I can be different, I ever wanna be different and this will not be a problem to me but the problem is my discipline... OMG, I`m sucks to have any responsibilities, like to study english (grammar) and Italian or French, too Motion Graphics and many anothers. God help me !!! I can to see how much i need it but ever I start and not close. As I need to study for University Exam next semester and I don`t start !!! I wanna speak French and Italian too but I`m not studying. I wanna item learn Motion Graphics and 3D for TV but I take any things to do and more a day without study. God this is sucks. I`ll go to repent about it.
I can not believe that I`m studying Mechatronics but Yes I am... I don`t really know the purpose of God to it is early to speak about it. I`ll study next semester about Eletronic and Mechanic and I hate it, but lets go. God have the best for me and He have a purpose on this situation and now I`m listening "He gave me a promisse - Fireflight" I love it, I`m writing with soundtrack.. the best it !!!
I guess that i`m learning to write, is simple, the problems is myself... hahahaha.... Today again, I think in her, I miss her here my future girl... I wanted talk with her but I can not !!! but I still wait for her... okay !!! I love her, my princess.
I`m fall in love for this moment here in my bed. Simply putting whats is my mind, my thoughts, my dreams, my life. am putting into words what only God knows, whats in deeper but is the time for me put out. I know that I begin with a subject and finishing with other but THIS IS ME !!! Everyday I go to a travel into my 5000 computer from mind... I love it !!! thanks God. You`re awesome.